When Your Mate is a Sociopath

The Myers-Briggs is a personality survey that classifies people into 16 different types; the first main division is that of introverts vs extroverts. Being an introvert, I was curious as to what else this survey might say about me, so I took a free online test at 16personalities.com. Although it is fairly common to be “mis-typed” when you take a free online test, much research on the INFJ type confirmed to me that this is my type, the most rare of introverted types. It also turns out that several of my good friends share this type with me, which has been very gratifying, and made my journey of self-discovery much less lonely.

In the months since I became aware of this, several major revelations have presented themselves. In the past, I have done some writing about narcissism and other psychological conditions, but found that thinking about this type of person became disturbing to my peace of mind, so I took a break. But now I am finding that the topic is coming up again, and I feel I must address an article that came to my attention recently. Here is a link to it:


I have friends and clients who have been involved with people with probable personality disorders. As one of the hallmark symptoms is a refusal to seek treatment, most of those afflicted have not been diagnosed. The few that have seen a therapist have been very skilled in demonizing their partners with the result that the therapist has felt that my normal but victimized friend was the one with the disorder. This is a form of triangulation, one of the tools of a narcissist.

When I read the above-linked article, realized with a gut-wrenching feeling that this described my best friend, and the past 20 years of her life. She has spent the last 5 years figuring out what to do, and thankfully has become mostly free of the sociopath. Recovering from the damage that was caused will take more time, but she is grateful to be in a position where she is confident that she will indeed recover.

I created this infographic as a way to easily share this information for those that are interested. Please feel free to share!

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